I was invited to do a short television interview on May 13 to talk about my book.

While on the one hand I’m excited for the opportunity, on the other I’m terrified.

The last time I spoke in front of people, I ended up putting my land surveyor’s license in jeopardy.

I know the circumstances aren’t remotely similar. I’m not speaking on behalf of anyone other than myself. I’m not presenting accurate technical information that people need to know in order to make informed decisions.

Sure, I learned a lesson from the entire experience: my words matter, and I should be careful what I say and how I say it. People need to be confident that what I tell them is the truth.

This upcoming interview is supposed to merely be a five-minute conversation between me and the interviewer. No one’s going to judge my each and every word as inaccurate or deceptive, because nothing is on the line. All I’m doing is talking about my book and writing.

Still the fear persists. Every time I think about it, I’m filled with a near dread.

Praying doesn’t help. And I admit it’s all my fault. Not only do I not trust myself, I don’t trust God enough to help me out.

I had prayed many times before that public meeting, yet the end result was an official reprimand and was told I was either ignorant or malicious by the so-called injured parties in front of a dozen other professionals.

So I’m sure you can understand my reticence, perhaps even my lack of trust even if neither are justified.

At the same time, any errors made from that meeting are all on me, not God. So is it fair to place the blame on him?

No. But it is easier.

Yet I must trust God no matter the circumstances, to forget it’s not about me anyway, but about glorifying him. Plus I must face my fears, and this interview is a perfect opportunity. Whether I succeed or fail is irrelevant, because sometimes facing our fears is the point, not the result.

“for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.” ~ 2 Timothy 1:7 (ESV)